Categories
Book Review

Before Her Eyes – Jack Jordan

I bought this with a few other books during one of my many book buying binges, and it was put on the shelf with my hundreds of books to be read, but it was one of those that I still did not forget the synopsis and was always looking forward to reading. The moment I started reading it, I was hooked and did not want to stop reading until I had all the answers and experienced the whole book while also kind of not wanting it to end because when I read a really good book, I feel like whatever I read next might not live up to this standard and I will forever be disappointed. Yeah… I worry over stupid things and I’m also very dramatic at times, just accept it for now and we’ll move forward together.

                Naomi Hannah, born blind and abandoned by her birth Mother at a young age finds herself living in a small coastal town where everyone knows everyone and gossip spreads like wildfire. Unhappy and plagued with suicidal thoughts Naomi always putting others before herself tries to come up with the best way to end her life with the least amount of trauma to those she loves, including her faithful companion guide dog Max.
                After a disaster shift at work she heads home and stumbles on a murder scene and although she can’t see the body or the killer, the killer can see her. Will she be next?

                Marcus who is new to the force but partnered with the closed off bully Lisa try to solve the murder but both keen to steer it in opposite directions and with conflicts of interest, secrets and lies it is not an easy task. Could Naomi help, would she even want to?

                I found myself in awe of Naomi who was living as independently as possible and despite her mental health issues she kept trying to continue and doing her best get through her obstacles. She is a unique character to any others I’ve read in a book before, and it was quite an experience. I always find myself attached to characters in books, but this was something else. I could feel her claustrophobia, her panic, her disorientation. I could really get myself in her head and she’s a character that will stay with me for a very long time.
                I would highly recommend this book, it was beautifully written and although heavy going emotionally and as intense it was, it was a journey that I loved from start to finish.

Categories
blog

Struggling To Cope

So when I got my blood test results a few weeks back it says hypothyroidism and prediabetes. My GP said ‘Oh it’s hypothyroidism, don’t bother Googling it. All your symptoms though are caused by anxiety. We’ll do a blood test in 12 weeks’

Obviously I Googled it as I’m not just going to ignore it.

Since then I’ve had good days, bad days but in general feel unable to cope. Today I have been in bed most of the day. I’ve not been in work this week as I’ve been too exhausted. Also I have pain in my joints, my calves, I keep getting headaches, foggy brain, sore eyes, dizzy spells and last night my thumbs started to hurt a lot. But then I am stressing about money which also doesn’t help. I need to work but I just can’t some days. Writing this is a huge struggle but I need to get out how I’m feeling as I feel so much bottled up right now. Sorry if there is any spelling errors or it doesn’t read very well.

I contacted the doctor again as I can’t live like this. They will call me on Friday which seems so far away.

I’m so miserable. I have so much I want to do, so much I want to achieve and just feel like I’m trying to get through the day. I want to write, I want to stream, I want to go walking and get some sunshine. I have a pile of washing to sort out, clothes to put away and I need a shower (I haven’t had the energy to wash for a couple of days please don’t judge me) and ideally I need to go to work. But the thought of even picking up a dish just makes me feel like crying. I don’t know what to do.

I’m going to go have a shower though and hopefully that’ll help put me in a better mood.

Look after yourselves and have a fantastic day ❤

Categories
blog

Mixed Feelings

Congratulations one and all we have nearly made it through the first week of schools being reopened, unless you aren’t from the UK and then well congratulations for making it through the majority of the week. Hopefully, you have all had a great week so far and hopefully will continue to and also have a fantastic weekend. I am rooting for you!

I’ve been a little conflicted in my thoughts in regard to the schools reopening, there are so many pros and cons to them opening. In terms of me having more time to focus on writing, streaming, and cleaning my neglected house then it is great! My son seems to have a bit of a skip in his step since being back and seeing his friends even though he is adamant that he hates school. But on the other hand I can’t help but worry about the covid situation. How long will it go on for and will this put us in more danger again?

Hopefully with the vaccine and some people now having immunity against it, we’ll be ok but I don’t know. I have doubts.

But I am trying to be optimistic and focus on the positives. I am yet to stream this week but I have been writing more, reading more and trying to get organised.

What is helping you get through? What are your thoughts?

Anyway, time to get ready for work.

Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started